"For better or worse, in good times and bad"

Derek Norbin Honeywell 11/9/1980-5/18/2010


I knew that I married an amazing man on May 2nd. I knew in my heart that he meant it when he said, "for better or worse, in good times and bad". I just didn't know that this would be put to the test so soon.

You see, my older brother, Derek, passed away on Tuesday, May 18th, 2010 at the age of 29. It was unexpected, and beyond heart-breaking.

Derek and I had a rough couple of years. His son, my nephew, Ashton, passed away in September of 2005. Derek was never the same. He was too proud to admit that maybe he needed to talk with someone...and, he couldn't really come to terms with the fact that it was ok to be sad, devastated, angry...and he took it out on the people that he loved. Luckily, Derek and I started talking a lot back in February. He started making fun of me like a big brother should. He would call to say that he loved me. He came to my wedding and told me that I was beautiful, and that he was so happy for Tim and I. That was the last time I ever saw him.

I talked to Derek after Tim and I returned from our honeymoon. He told me that he never wanted a bad relationship with me again. He said that he wanted to start hanging out more. I hung up the phone, and told Tim how happy that made me.

When I found out that Derek had passed away so suddenly I couldn't really wrap my mind around it. I didn't want to eat. I couldn't stop crying. I felt like I wasn't a good wife. And, I felt like an even worse mom. I kept forgetting to feed Little Dude. It was at this time, I realized that Little Dude wasn't hungry because Tim made sure he still had 3 meals a day. Tim made sure that I had my favorite foods at home and encouraged me to eat. Tim would read Little Dude his good night books and tuck him in. He would hold me in his arms and just let me cry. He didn't leave my side for a week.

I realize how blessed I am to have Tim. He is my rock. He's my best friend. He's my soft place to fall. With him, I don't always have to be strong, or brave. It's not "me against the world". It's Me, and my Husband. My beautiful, amazing, loving, patient, supportive husband.